I feel like I’ve been going at a thousand miles per hour for the past five months without an oil change. Sometimes I lose sight of the big picture, errrmmm, what’s the big picture again?!?!?!?!?

What exactly are we doing all of this for? For our kids? Kids, kids? For our parents? To make them proud? I’m so confused!

Three months ago I was happy, content, nothing could break me, I felt like … Superman! Now, I lay here recovering from the exhaustion, stress, and curveballs life has thrown at me within a single inning. How do we balance our lives so that when we’re at work, we work, and when we’re at home, we work? Hold on … Is this really what life has in store for me?

Is it only me that has the pressure of “doing the best that I can”? Is it only me that wants to become SOMEBODY and not just ANYBODY? I am sure I am not alone, but how do they do it? How do they have the balance?

So, last week, I did what I usually do, I closed myself up. I put up those barriers and refilled the moat. I seemed to lose focus on the one person that matters most, me. How selfish is that? Can I really live the rest of my life having to resort to “focusing on myself” now and again?

Selfish or not, it keeps me healthy right now. I’ll continue as long as I can find someone who I can share my pain with.